No Community Without Commitment

‘I don’t feel that motivated to find a church’ I say to my friend. I explain that after years of not really feeling like I fit in with those in church I don’t feel compelled to find a new church to attend at my new University. I knew I was going to find one eventually, but the desire to make the effort was not there. It’s a difficult thing to navigate sometimes, enjoying church and being impacted by the Word but not enjoying what can feel like forced engagements with those around you. However, a teaching that I heard a few weeks ago really altered my perspective.

A few weeks ago, I had the amazing opportunity to go on a Christian fellowship retreat. During the first session of the retreat we spoke about friendship and were asked to read an extract of ‘The Pursuit of God in the Company of Friends’ by Richard Lamb. Considering the conversation that I’d had with my friend I found the message timely. The extract ‘the transforming power of discipleship in community’ outlined the importance of Christian community in way I hadn’t seen before. In modern day Christianity we hear a lot about the importance of community. We are told that it’s important to attend church, have Christian friends, attend small groups etc. And that all sounds very cute but what about when you don’t feel compelled to do so? You have gone to your new church at University, you’ve attended a Christian society or small group but after sizing everyone up you decide that you could never fit in with the people, so what next?

It can be difficult to feel completely on the same wave length with people in church, and that’s the truth. I felt like a very sheltered, introspective person amidst very street-smart, extroverted teenagers at my youth church and it made it hard for me to try to connect with people. Perhaps the same is for you, maybe you’re very introverted and the happy clappy nature of your church makes you assume that you won’t fit in. Maybe you’re black and you go to a predominantly white church. Maybe you’re working class and the members of your church are very affluent. Or maybe you don’t feel as “Christian” as those around you, you can’t recite scripture and don’t know theology, but you have a desire to learn. Simply because we’re human all those things can stop us from trying to connect with Christian communities in our lives. However, the onus is on us to try and embrace Christian community.

Now, I think very emotionally so it’s pretty radical for me to ever say that the onus is on an individual to make things work. I mean there are so many factors that stop us from embracing Christian community. Sometimes people aren’t friendly, sometimes we’re bad at making friends and other times having a relationship with God by ourselves seems like enough. However, this is one thing I’m not going to cuddle anyone about because you must make the conscious decision to embrace the Christian communities in your life. It’s a must.

One thing that struck me in the teaching was ‘there is no community without commitment’. A lot of us don’t like to commit to things and being non-committal is so ingrained in our culture but it’s destructive. You can’t attend church sporadically or go to your Christian fellowship whenever you need a boost and then complain that you don’t have Christian friends. You must commit. COMMIT!!!! Put your all into it, get to know people, form relationships with people. Get to know people and let people get to know you. Even if you make the decision to simply say hi to a different person every week, COMMIT. I know it can be hard and sometimes feel a little forced, but we need to commit to the Christian communities we’re part of. A little awkwardness in the initial stages of committing is worth the companionship and good counsel in the long run.

Think of it like this, when you do group work sometimes the people you’re made to work with aren’t your ‘kind of people’ but you must make things work because you have a common goal. As Christians our common goal is heaven and closer than that, a relationship with God on earth so learning to embrace time together is so important.

I am passionate about this topic because life can get so hard. Your thoughts can drown you, your school work, Uni work, home-life, health can really attempt to drown you, but you can stay floating when you have people holding you. Too many of us are suffering in silence when we have communities we can engage with, they are there. Please find a Christian community, pray about whether it’s a place where you can grow and commit to attending the church, small group, bible study, campus fellowship, whatever it may be. There’s no community without commitment decide to commit today.

We’re all on this journey together, share your thoughts, feelings and experiences with me by commenting below, tweeting your thoughts or sending me a dm or personal message on Twitter or Instagram. Stay blessed and beautiful. #itunuspeaks