Part Two: Deconstructing Imperfection

I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me- 2 Corinthians 12:9

At the end of my last post I left you with two pieces of advice; take your time to strategically address your blind-spots and be kind to yourself. Today, I want to address the first part and in turn deconstruct imperfection.

Have you ever heard anyone talk about a negative attribute they have and say, ‘that’s just the way I am’? Whether it is always being late, unreliable, moody, selfish etc sometimes we justify our negative and destructive attributes by reveling in how inherently flawed we are. We throw away the pressure of perfection and embrace imperfection, telling ourselves that our flaws make us who we are and we don’t ever need to change. Popular culture reinforces this narrative, telling us that we’re perfect and we should love ourselves flaws and all. However, what if in embracing imperfections, we’re doing more harm than good?

Now, considering I spent a whole post telling us to disregard the pressure of perfection, talking about not embracing imperfections seems counter-intuitive right? However, flow with me for a second. I think that we all have certain imperfections that will be destructive to ourselves and others if not addressed. There is a trend on Twitter where people talk about ‘toxic friends. These are friends who possess destructive attributes that negatively impact those around them. However, permit me to say that every single one of us has ‘toxic’ attributes that we sometimes embrace in the name of ‘this is just the way I am’ and that is what I aim to deconstruct.

Christianity is a constant cycle of trying to be more like Christ, so in turn Christianity is a constant cycle of being made aware of your imperfections. Truth is, how can you be a better person, if you don’t know what you need to work on? It can be difficult when you are going deeper in your faith and you start realising imperfections that you have. It can be difficult to accept that you are greedy or selfish and that the friendly chit chat you enjoy so much is really gossiping. This is something that I find challenging sometimes, always having something to work on. However, despite the process being difficult at times, I am reminded that in highlighting my imperfections God is showing me His love by pushing me to aspire to something better; being more Christ like. 2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

We need to own our imperfections, but we also need to disregard this culture that teaches us not to work on them. I will highlight a few of my own imperfections for example purposes. I can be incredibly disorganised, and I have come to realise no Itunu you are not a free-spirit you are DISORGANISED, so, what do I do to address this? I try a lot of things; lists, diaries, post it notes not everything works, but I’m in the process of becoming the organised woman I want to be. I think one thing I’m trying to get into is a routine that always has a dash of fun. For example, I had Zumba yesterday, I have Pilates today and I’m getting my nails done on Friday, all while fitting in my course readings, homework and writing for this site. I am piloting this new routine and will see where it takes me. Any tips for organisations, share below or tweet your thoughts.

Another flaw of mine, lateness. Being late used to be my forte before nearly fighting with my best friend about it. After being told ‘when you get to places late it makes me feel like you don’t value my time’ I received the kick I needed to shift my thoughts from oh I’m black and I’m a girl so of course I’m always fashionably late, to I need my friends and those around me to know that I can be on time and reliable because I value them and their time. So, I am also working on that too. I am learning to accept that putting on make-up to complete my outfit is unnecessary when I have a lesson to go to. But this flaw is one I’m still working on so any advise will be much appreciated.

We all have our imperfections. Maybe we’re petty the bible says “do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil” Ephesians 4:26, maybe we’re always fearful “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” Philippians 4:6-7. Or perhaps we’re prideful or obnoxious “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted”. Matthew 23:16 Also, look at 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and put your name in place of the words love and it and ask yourself will the statement still be true. Are you patient? Are you kind? Are you envious? Ask yourself.

The bible has solutions to all our human imperfections so let us start using it, alongside prayer, to practically address our blind-spots and be the best versions of ourselves that we can be.

We’re all on this journey together, share your thoughts, feelings and experiences with me by commenting below, tweeting your thoughts or sending me a dm or personal message on Twitter or Instagram.

Stay blessed and beautiful.

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